suffering

Some people have a passion for shoes or food, others are passionately in love.

The word 'passion' is almost always used as a synonym for the words 'love'.

Passion actually derives from the Greek word πάσχω (paskho), which means 'to suffer'.

Yes, one may suffer in love, and that is passionate, but the ultimate poster boy for being passionate was, and is, Jesus.

He suffered so much for us:

"he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins.

He was beaten so we could be whole.

He was whipped so we could be healed."

Isaiah 53:5*

This suffering is huge, imagine being beaten or whipped for someone you don't even know? I know that there has been times I’ve seen people punished (just simple ones like a detention or a speeding ticket), and I have just stood there, posing as an innocent bystander, it never crossed my mind to take their suffering upon myself. Most of the time I’m just glad it wasn’t me who was caught.

But Jesus took the blame for everything, everything we have ever done.

In His death and His suffering, we are forgiven. He was perfect, but took it all.

That is passion.

But it doesn’t stop there.

As followers of Christ it is not going to be easy, because true followers of Him are passionate about Him. This means that we will have to suffer.

Life isn’t easy; we will be mocked, ridiculed and persecuted for being Christians.

All of that will be worth it, because if we continue to love Him through everything, we will receive His glory. It is his love and acceptance that truly matters. That is what is everlasting, not the acceptance of this world that will end in a few decades.

One cannot say they have a passion for the Lord if they are not willing to suffer for what they believe in, to suffer for the eternal love He has to offer.

“together with Christ we are heirs of God’s glory. But if we are to share his glory, we must also share his suffering.”

Romans 8:17

*How rad is it that Jesus' redemption for our sins is prophesied in Isaiah - hundreds of years before he was even born?

Go.

As a literature student, most would think that my favorite genre of book may be classic, the gothic, or perhaps comedy.

But I love adventure stories. The epic narrative.

Stories that have a hero, a task, a dragon, there is testing and endurance and fighting.

In adventure there is love, loss and learning.

Adventure speaks to me. It is the dreams of children, these dreams seem to be stifled somewhere on the journey to adulthood, and adventure is soon only present flickering in the nostalgic memories, and within black ink printed upon a page.

I want it to parallel my life, I cannot go on living a life that I plan for myself, because life is unexpected, and the unexpected happens within the narrative of adventure. I have to let go of the life that I have planned for myself in order to embark on the journey that is waiting for me, the adventure that God created.

This is my life.

And life is scary and daunting and sometimes it is so tempting to just remain where I am comfortable. You can go through life just watching the action, but there will be a sense within you that you are missing out on something huge, you will get restless.

A life of safety and comfort does not make a good story.

There is a kind of life and elation in doing something that scares me.

Unreal things happen when you do something that scares you.

It is in these epiphanic moments that God is present.*

To push through the scariest thing that I can imagine: This makes me the hero in my own adventure.

I will conquer my own limitations, I will fight the bad guys, I will achieve my task. I will do this with the guidance and by the strength of God.

May you always do what you are afraid to do.

*epiphany |iˈpifənē|

noun ( pl. -nies) (also Epiphany)

the manifestation of Christ to the Gentiles as represented by the Magi (Matthew 2:1–12).

• a manifestation of a divine or supernatural being.

• a moment of sudden revelation or insight.

And thank you to the lovely Francine Chapman for taking the photo.

That is me, at the pinnacle of the pinnacles.

Blessings in disguise.

One thing that God taught me when I was away was about blessings in disguise.

Two weeks before I was due to leave and finally come home a volcano in Chile erupted. In those last two weeks I was constantly scared that I wouldn’t be able to get home. By this time I was really missing home and the thought of not being able to get home made me feel sick. One week before I was due to leave, no flights at all were landing or taking off in New Zealand. Over the whole of New Zealand was a giant ash cloud.

I was supposed to be flying Trujillo to Lima, Lima to Santiago (in Chile) and then Santiago to Auckland.

My flight from Santiago to New Zealand was cancelled.

After trying to find a flight – any flight, the only thing that could be done was to just go to Santiago and figure it out from there.

I was supposed to have a visa to get into Chile which I didn’t have, but somehow they let me into the country. I spent about three or four hours at Santiago airport desperately trying to get home. Finally, the girl at the desk told me the next flight I could get on was in a week and it flew straight to New Zealand. I told her to put me on it; I just really wanted to get home! She looked on her computer and then told me that the last seat had been taken just two minutes before.

It was really hard not to just break down and cry at this point.

So instead, I was put on a flight that also left in a week, but flew Santiago to Tahiti, Tahiti to Sydney, and finally Sydney to Auckland. All up it was 27 hours on a plane. I really wanted to be on the flight directly to New Zealand, but I had to settle with this one.

It was so frustrating.
But it was God taking care of me, he knew so much more than I did.

The next day, the flight directly to New Zealand, the flight I was supposed to be on, was cancelled.

In those moments at the airport I thought God wasn’t listening to my prayers, when really He knew the bigger picture.

That was the first blessing in disguise.

The second blessing in disguise was my week in Santiago. In Peru I was so busy and going crazy with worry about getting home. When I got home, it was so overwhelming, and my days were filled with catching up with everyone. Santiago was God’s gift of rest. It was a week where I could just sleep, spend time with God and see the city. It was a really good week, and Santiago is a really cool city, now it’s one of my favourite cities. I am now really thankful that God blessed me with that week.

In the Narnia book The Horse and His Boy by C.S. Lewis, the protagonist Shasta seems to come across a lot of misfortune. It is not until Shasta meets Aslan does he see that Aslan has been working in his life in so many different ways.

Aslan says “tell me your sorrows”
Shasta was a little reassured by the breath: so he told how he had never known his real father or mother and had been brought up sternly by the fisherman. and then he told the story of his escape and how they were chased by lions and forced to swim for their lives; and of all their dangers in Tashbaan and about his night among the Tombs and how the beasts howled at him out of the desert. And he told about the heat and thirst of their desert journey and how they were almost at their goal when another lion chased them and wounded Aravis. And also, how very long it was since he had anything to eat.
“I do not call you unfortunate,” said the Large Voice.
“Don’t you think it was bad luck to meet so many lions?” said Shasta.
“There was only one lion.” said the Voice.
“What on earth do you mean? I’ve just told you there were at least two lions the first night, and -”
“There was only one, but he was swift of foot.”
“How do you know?”
“I was the lion.”
And as Shasta gaped with open mouth and said nothing, the Voice continued. “I was the lion who forced you to join with Aravis. I was the cat who comforted you among the houses of the dead. I was the lion who drove the jackals from you as you slept. I was the lion who gave the Horses the new strength of fear for the last mile so that you should reach King Lune in time. And I was the lion you do not remember who pushed the boat in which you lay, a child near death, so that it came to shore where a man sat, wakeful at midnight, to receive you.”

Aslan had looked after and protected Shasta the whole way, and Shasta didn’t even know.

Like Shasta, so many things which I saw as problems or inconveniences happened when I was overseas, but it was God taking care of me, He saw further than I did.

I made it home finally.

God gave me a huge adventure, and it was amazing. I saw so much, I learnt so much, I did so much. But the best part was that God was in every moment of that adventure.

Look.

Sometimes I doubt.

I begin to lose my sureness and I lose sight of God working in my life. 
I think I've lost sight.
Really, I have just closed my eyes.

And I need to reopen them. 
I need to open them and look around me.

I open my eyes and I see:

Golden light radiating so bright and so warm, giving life to everything it kisses.
Leaves that have internal pathways for water and life to reach it's very tips.
Stars that wink at me, full of mischief and mystery.
Blue eyes shifting to green overnight.
Pure white snow, glowing in the moonlight. 

I see all of these things, and so much more.

"for ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see His invisible qualities - His eternal power and divine nature." - Romans 1:20

One only has to open their eyes and see that nature, all of God's creation, is bursting with life and beauty. So perfectly and amazingly created, one cannot help but sense, feel that there must be more, must be a greater power.

My doubt is diminished every time I hear a heartbeat.

I know that He is the creator and the divine lifegiver of me.

Just take a moment to stop and look. To see the miraculous in the mundane things you pass by daily. To see the intricate design and beauty of them.

And soon you will realize that things will cease to be mundane. You will see the amazing, brilliant creation that God had moulded and shaped for us.
Notice more.

Just look.
And believe.

The moon.

The inanimate object, the dead chunk of rock that is suspended above our earth - the moon is a truly beautiful thing. 

I love seeing the Cheshire cat smile sliver of the waning moon. Smiling down at me.
The nights of the full moon that show it's brilliance.

The nights when the moon is not there, concealed by cloud, or still yet to rise, cause the immense blackness, the dark, the night, to be so vast.

The black of the night sky is unending. 

The moon is somewhat a comfort when it is there.

The nearness rids the sky of danger and installs a sense of safety within me. 

When the moon is above me, near in the sky, everything is okay.
When the Lord is near, everything is okay.


Scientifically speaking, the moon is a lifeless object, cold and grey. 

But, the light of the sun is reflected by the moon. And by reflecting that light, the moon sheds light on an otherwise dark world.

Without the sun, the moon is nothing.

One could say that we need to be like the moon. 
Psalm 34:5 reads "look to Him and be radiant."

Reflect the light of God, the light of the Son. He is the giver of the light, the radiance.

The world, the earth is a dark place, and like the earth to the moon, a force like gravity pulls us towards it. 

The pull of the world.
Gravity.

Constantly the world is pulling us in, tempting us with things that seem so great, so fun, so easy.

But so empty. 
So dark.
So lifeless.

Is there life in selfishness? 

Give in to gravity, or resist it. 
There are only two options. 

We can choose to be out of the world, as the moon is. And we can reflect the light of the Son onto the darkness of the world.

He provides the light, gives it to us.
Now, reflect it.

Without the sun, the moon is nothing.
Without the Son, I am nothing.

A name

“They say Aslan is on the move - perhaps has already landed.”
And now a very curious thing happened. None of the children knew who Aslan was any more than you do; but the moment the Beaver had spoken these words everyone felt quite different. Perhaps it has sometimes happened to you in a dream that someone says something which you don't understand but in the dream it feels as if it had some enormous meaning - either a terrifying one which turns the whole dream into a nightmare or else a lovely meaning too lovely to put into words, which makes the dream so beautiful that you remember it all your life and are always wishing you could get into that dream again. It was like that now. At the name of Aslan each one of the children felt something jump in its inside. Edmund felt a sensation of mysterious horror. Peter felt suddenly brave and adventurous. Susan felt as if some delicious smell or some delightful strain of music had just floated by her. And Lucy got the feeling you have when you wake up in the morning and realize that it is the beginning of the holidays or the beginning of summer. - The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe

The thought of God, and to hear His name can have a different affect on me at different times in my life.
So many different feelings, moods. Never static, ever-changing.

Sometimes, I long to hear that name, when He feels so distant, I will go frantically searching to find out everything and anything about Him.
But, other times, I shy from that name. The name will conjure a sense of shame in me, as past and current sins begin to surface in the front of my mind.

On rare occasions that the name of God overwhelms me and fills me up with such an astounding happiness and lightness within me.
It is at times like these that I wish upon the clocks to stop moving, upon the earth to cease spinning.
The far and few times I have felt like this have been so brilliantly lit in my memory have helped me to endure, and push through the times when I feel the darkness is overwhelming me, drowning me.

It is these moments of perfection that I hope for every day.
And the remembrance of the moments cause me to continue to strive towards Him.
I want to be closer and closer.

His name does make me feel differently at different times; scared, unsure, ashamed, happy, sad, lonely, crazy, numb.
I want the sound of His name to make me feel endlessly happy and the thought of Him to be perfect. I want this, so I endeavour to alter something in my life, and the sound of God's name changes upon hearing it, and I want to be at a time where His name is all that I want to hear.

To change the feeling I receive when I hear His name, I have to change something within my life.


How does the name of God make you feel?

What is unseen.

So, my big adventure is over, but the greatest adventure has only just begun.

After three months in Peru, I was really ready to go home. There is no place like home.
But, God had other ideas in mind for me.

In Southern Chile a volcano erupted three weeks prior to when I had planned to leave, jeopardizing my flight home. Those three weeks, I will say, were the hardest three weeks of my time away.
Weeks of stress, of wanting to go home.
Weeks of tears and nightmares and frustration that I could not change the movements of the earth or of the atmosphere. It was out of my hands.

I ended up stranded, in limbo, halfway between Peru and New Zealand. I was in Santiago, Chile. My flight was cancelled.

I was not going home.

That moment, was one of those moments when I wish, when I have a longing to know something - anything of what God was doing, of His plans.
But, of course, I had no idea.

But, then He said to me:

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:5-6

All of those troubles, the tears and the nightmares I had in Peru, in the place that was familiar to me, quickly vanished.
And, it was in the unknown city, in the place of uncertainty and where I was lost, that I was found.

I realised that I no longer felt scared of what would happen to me, I knew that now I would look beyond what I can see.
To what is unseen.

Because I will never be able to figure out what God has planned for me, I will never be able to decipher Him.
But, this place of unknown allows room for trust.
To trust despite having no idea.

To know that when suddenly all of my plans have dissolved in my hands, it is because of precisely that - they are in my hands.
And I needed to transfer it all, everything, even the parts that are hard to let go of, into His hands.
For in His hands nothing will go wrong.

I still have no idea why God wanted me in Santiago.
But I should stop asking why He did that or why He's doing this. I should just trust Him.

And lean not on my own understanding.

A smile

The spanish translation of the word 'smile' is sonrisa.
Sonrisa is my favourite word in the spoken Spanish language. To me, the word conjures an image of the sun rising. And the dark before the dawn disappears as the sun shines it's light and warmth on the cold world.

One simple smile, one sonrisa should shed light on all that surrounds you.

Like smiles, Christians should light a room when you step inside.
To shine the light of Jesus is what He called us to do.

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put in under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven." - Matthew 5:14-16

Smiles are contagious.
We should be contagious.
As Christians light should shine through us.
We cannot merely thank God for saving us, we need to continue to do His work, we need to show all that He is and can do in how we live.

I want to radiate the love of God so much that people are drawn to the shine, to the warmth.
And others will want a share in that light.

You cannot live your life under the bowl, under the radar.
If you hide, the the light cannot be seen.
Do not be afraid you will scare people with the light.
Your light, your shining will allow others to shine too. And to share in the love and light.

If you feel you have no idea how to shine this light, or that you just don't have the strength, then ask God to shine His light through you.
Because ultimately, that is what the light is - He is shining through you.

Smiles can communicate so much. Without any words.
Happiness.
Love.
Understanding.
But most of all, smiles are a beacon of hope.
And that hope is the light of the world: Jesus.

And that hope is what we live for.

But a breath

At home in New Zealand, I have an amazing circle of love and support that surrounds me and is there every way I look.
I have Reece, my amazing boyfriend who supports me, challenges me and causes growth in my faith.
My parents, who have done a downright awesome job in raising me, teaching me good values and bringing me to faith in the first place.
My brother and sister who have made me the person I am today and I would be so lonely without them in my life.
And my group of friends, old and new, apart of Clevedon or not, who have always been there for me in one way or another.

Truely, God has blessed me with the amazing people in my life, and I am ever thankful for every one of you.

When I came to Peru, no one came with me.
I came alone.

Alone physically.

But God has never left my side the entire time.

When I was crying on the plane 1024 metres in the air - He was there.
When it was near impossible to fathom the beauty of Machu Picchu - He was there.
When I have felt alone
When I have felt in danger
When I just want to give in
He was, and is, always there.

The danger in putting so much trust and leaning so heavily on people is just that, they are people.

Isaiah 2:22 says 'stop trusting in man, who has but a breath in his nostrils.'

Humans are human and will eventually let me down in some way, not be there for me, or leave to go and live in some obscure country. Humans have 'but a breath', it could take one moment for someone to cease living.

Being in Peru, I cannot expect Reece to be there to tell me I'm beautiful if I'm feeling insecure, I cannot run to mum when everything is falling apart and I can't hang out with Ryan and Leah when I'm lonely.

But wherever I am in the world, surrounded by my community of love or not - God will never, never fail me in being there.
God doesn't need a passport to go somewhere, He can fit into car if that is where you need Him and He is in the wilderness in the middle of nowhere, and He's also at the supermarket.

Trust in God.
To be there wherever you go.
To be there when you need Him.
In the hard times and in the good times.
He is not human, and therefore will not fail you.

It is so good to surround yourself with amazing people, who love you.
But ultimately God is the only one who will never let you down.
For He will always be with you.

Remember that.

Communication

Seeing the children here and knowing the lives that they were born into were lives that no child deserves causes me to pray that they will find a home, feel loved and that God will be present in their lives. Being here I pray for strength when I need it, I pray for safety when I feel in danger and for health when I am sick.

What is prayer?

I believe that prayer is direct communication with God.
Prayer is being open, raw and vulnerable.
It is not limited to keeling with hands clasped.

Often, I find myself praying only when it is needed. Only when something is on my mind, only at certain times of the day.

One should pray not because of want, need, or the feeling of obligation. Prayer is as essential to life as breathing is, as water.
To be in a relationship with God, prayer is central. No relationship or friendship can ever survive without communication.
The lack of communication due to language barriers have hindered me in friendships with those who only speak Spanish.

But prayer does not have any boundaries. God speaks the same language of you, the language of the heart and soul. There is no language barrier.

In my life, I desire for prayer is be an open and constant connection to God. Ever present and never ceasing. I strive for that.
But sometimes, I don't even know what to pray for, I have no idea how to pray constantly.

Romans 8:26 says "We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express."

Prayers aren't just words. They are thoughts, meditations. But if one does not know what to pray for or how to pray, prayer can just be the willingness to open yourself to God, and allowing for the Holy Spirit to pray for you, and through you.
For no one knows your deepest desires, fears, longings or needs better than God.
To expose yourself to God like this changes you.


Yes you should pray when you have an exam, when you need strength, when a loved one is sick and when you need protection. But, don't limit your prayers!! The only thing stopping you is yourself.
If a prayer is powerful in itself, then how powerful will prayer be if it is constant and never paused? If a relationship has neverending communication, then it will be so much closer, tightly knit and strong.

Don't pray because you need to.
Pray because it is a part of who you are.

With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation.

- Isaiah 12:3

Children have so much JOY.
And it is joy of the simple. Jhon as I fly him as an aeroplane instead of regular carrying. Jose-Luis as he chases after bubbles. Or Pedro and Jorge as Kelly and I balance dominoes on their faces (of all things!).

Once we grow out of childhood, it begins to get harder and harder to have constant joy that comes naturally.
Because joy is a choice.
Either one can chose to look upon life (the good, the bad and everything else in the spectrum) with the lens of gloom, or one can look upon life with the lens of joy.
And joy is lasting.

C.S Lewis said "No soul that seriously and constantly desires joy will ever miss it."
So, if you choose joy and seek joy, you will surely find it.
You will find it in the places you expect, and the places that are utterly unexpected. For joy is a gift from God.

This is not to say that having joy is easy. Being joyful in situations that don't seem to have any glimmer of joy in them at all is really, really hard.
But it is these times that joy is needed. Truely needed. Joy brings hope and light and joy is contagious.
Whenever I feel really down, homesick or weary, the pure and raw joy of the kids here instantly infect me. And this joy comes from kids who have no parents, are abandoned, have come from the street, were abused and these kids have gone through things no child should ever even have knowledge of. Logically, these kids should have no joy, but God has given them such great joy!

Joy liberates.
Joy brings one closer to God.
We should have joy for the simple fact that we are alive!!

So step forth in joy. Joy for life and joy for God.


"You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; The mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands." - Isaiah 55:12

Awake

I am a night person.
And especially in Peru I find it a battle to get up every morning. As soon as I am conscious, I know that I have a long day ahead of me. I have a day of testing, a day of endurance. A day of comforting crying children and not knowing what is wrong. The thought of this, makes me want to roll over and drift off into oblivion.

God did not bring me here to be asleep.
He brought me here to be wide awake.

Awake in life.
Awake in spirit.

To be spiritually asleep is to be non-existent.
Without passion, without energy, no impact is made.

Jesus came to wake us up.

To merely go through the daily course of life isn't good enough.
God did not give you every day on this earth just so you could tolerate them. He gave you every day to be fully alive and awake in Him.
To be on fire with passion.
Passion in anything that you do. In teaching, in learning, in having a conversation, in cooking.

In living.

Be awake. Live and do what you do with so much energy and Life, because He died so we could have that Life.
Wake up from the sins of the world.

"wake up, o sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you" - Ephesians 5:14

Just think, if the souls of everyone were roused, how much power and impact could we have in the world?
The impact that we are called to make.

Wake up.

Love is patient

"love is patient" can be translated into my life as "Laura needs to be patient". I am happy to truthfully admit that I am not a patient human being. Always wanting what is next, wanting things to hurry up, rushing towards the next year, month, day, minute.
As all parents will agree, children test the limits of your patience. I remember asking a million times "are we there yet", I also remember Dad patiently teaching me to drive, I made the same mistakes again and again, but he would patiently go over it again with me.

In the afternoons I help first graders with their homework. Immense amounts of patience is needed for this. Sometimes my patience is tested when I translate their homework instructions to "draw the meeting of the magic words", neither them nor I have any idea what the magic words are, or how we could draw them. But my patience is most needed when I work with Orianna. She is the sweetest, but she has learning difficulties and can be distracted by the smallest things. If I do not give her my full, undivided attention, she will not get anything done. Slowly but surely we go through all her work. She constantly is erasing, saying she can't do it, getting distracted, wanting water. But, at the end she is so happy, overwhelmed with the achievement that she did it!! And the best part is that she turns to me, throws get arms around me and says "me amo Tia". Which makes the testing of my patience worth every bit.

If my patience is tested with small things like this, I can imagine that God's patience for me is huge. As I always make the same mistakes, as I get distracted and as I forget things. But He is there, quietly but surely working with me as I do the work He has called me to do. Like a parent, He will go over it with me, twice, thrice, until I learn. And if I mess up again, He will not lose His cool, but He stays patient. He understands.

For God is love.
And "love is patient" - 1 Corinthians 13:4

Jessica

Woke up Monday morning to find out I all the long term volunteers and the madres were going to be out. At the last minute they realized someone needed to look after baby Jessica all morning. At first, with no one to run to if everything turned to custard, I was thinking this:




















But, as the morning went on, it turned into this:




















She is the sweetest baby and I pray that God has an amazing plan for her as she grows up!

Come all you weary.

At the moment I am sick. With an awful cold. Yuk. All weekend I have spent almost all of my time in my room, trying to recover; armed with cough drops, hot tea and vaporub. So, this gives me a lot of time to myself.

Thinking.
Reading.

The work that all of the volunteers do here is tough. It is rewarding, but it is not easy. At the end of some days, I have zero energy left, it has all been sucked out. I get worn out: mentally with constantly trying to interpret and talk to the kids here. Physically playing with them, carrying the younger ones, soccer on a hot day is tiring. And emotionally thinking about what some of the kids have been through and giving so much love to them.

In regards to my body and my health and being sick, I feel exhausted. My body is working overtime trying to heal. This makes me remember all the times I have felt spiritually weary. This happens both at home and in Peru.

Everyone gets burnt out, and at some point, everyone feels drained. This feeling has been frequent lately. Sometimes I don't have the energy to go on, to serve anymore.

But (thank goodness there is always a but)

'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' - Matthew 11:28

Sometimes to world tells us that we have to have it all together to be a Christian. That we have to sort everything out and be perfect to follow God.
But we don't.
Jesus didn't come to earth for the healthy, he came for the sick (Luke 5:31). A healthy man doesn't go to a doctor, because he doesn't need to. We are all sick, and all need God.
Humans are human. That means we are not perfect. No one can do it on their own. God is here for us, here to lighten our burdens, to carry them for us.
We need to admit that we are sick, that what we are carrying is too heavy for us, and we need help. By admitting this to God, He begins to heal us.

But we can only be healed if we are willing to ask for help.

He won't carry our burdens unless we want Him to.

And then, we will have rest for our souls.



On a side note:
I know this really awesome guy who introduces me to really good music. As I wrote this post I listened to this song. You should too.

P.S. extra points for spotting the Narnia reference.

The Three Musketeers

Jhon (straight hair), Alejandro (curls) and Jose-Luis (on end hair). I look after these three in the mornings. They bring so much joy, drama and cheek to my mornings! I love them to pieces. Every day we sing songs, play outside, read books, do crafts, numbers, draw in chalk and just general all around fun stuff. They rarely smile for photos, but if I'm lucky I'll catch a giggle.

Jose-Luis is naughty, but gets away with it by giving endless hugs, Jhon is the brain box and corrects my spanish. He acts like a little man and likes to do things for himself, but deep down he's such a kid, he has the most adorable laugh - I wanna bottle it! And Alejandro loves cuddles and loves reading.

Pray for these three cute and precious boys, they have so much ahead of them. I know God will do some amazing things in their lives as they grow up!

Mark 10:14

Spending so much time with forty-odd kids has made me realize the immense and unerring faith children have. Jhon, who is three, was playing in the playhouse, it's platform is nearly as tall as me. When he wanted to come down, instead of climbing down the ladder, he shouted "TIA LAURA!" (aunty Laura) and suddenly leapt into my arms. He completly and unshakeably believed that I would catch him. (I did, thank goodness) He did not waver, or make sure I was ready, nor did he ask to be helped down.

He just jumped.

This made me think that child-like faith is needed. We need to jump, to leap into God's arms. Sometimes it's hard to trust that He will be there, and every time we doubt that He will catch us. Being here, and seeing the faith the kids have, has made me realize that I need to stop erring, and I need to trust - completly and utterly that God will always ALWAYS be there, ready to catch me. Without warning, He will be there. And once he has caught me, He will hold me, comfort me, strengthen me, and help me when I am ready to walk again. Even if it takes time, He will teach me to walk again, and He will let me know that I will never walk alone.

In Mark 10:14 Jesus says "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truely I tell you, anyone who will not recieve the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."

So have faith as trusting, undoubting, pure and loving, as children do. For even when we do not see Him, God will always be there.


"'Do not be afraid, for I am with you and I will rescue you,' declare the Lord" - Jeremiah 1:8

Rice, oreos and green tea

Here, the staple food is rice. I have rice for lunch, rice for dinner, and I'll usually have rice for breakfast. To mix things up I eat oreos and drink green tea. In all honesty the lack of range in food choices here makes me miss home so so much - especially Mum's cooking!
An average day for me consists of working with the kinder kids - who are three boys, Alejandro is three, Jhon is three and Jose-Luis is two. Yes, they are adorable and yes they are naughty. I then help organising all the books in the Biblioteca, they have so many book I want to read, but alas, they are all in spanish. Then there is lunch and tutoria, which is helping the kids with their homework.
The orphanage itself is situated just out of Trujillo, it's a desert, with sand-dunes behind it and the ocean across the road. There are seven other volunteers here, six from the US and one from Canada. For them, hot cross buns only exist in the song and packets of marshmallows consist of only white marshmallows - they must live a sad sad life deprived of hot cross buns and pink marshmallows. On the contrary, they have a zillion types of Reeses Pieces and Batman is from America. I love everyone here and get along with them really well, Ashley is my roommate. From Nebraska. It's kinda cool meeting people from all around the world and suddenly having an international spider web.

I'm sorry this post was merely facts and hugely uninspiring. But, actually, I don't really have an excuse, other than being uninspired.

Till next time
Laura

1 Timothy 4:12

Just before Easter weekend I arrived at Hogar de Esperanza. The desert is my new home. To say the least, it was surely a different Easter. There are thirty nine kids here, the age range is one to seventeen. Slowly I am learning names and characters as I try to make sense of their raced Spanish.
All of the other volunteers here I love!! All, bar one Canadian, are American, and thought hot cross buns only existed in the song. But alas, they are real! I really feel like I've been accepted into their little family.

There's one thing that I have been reminded again and again on this trip, and that is my youth. At eighteen I am still so young. Almost every adult I have met in Peru has said "but you're so young!" Hugely aware if my youth after so many comments began to hinder me, causing me to question myself and God if my youth brings about a lack of potential. Was there a problem with doing something like this at eighteen? I don't have wisdom of the years, nor more than eighteen years of life experience.

But then I came across 1 Timothy 4:12 "don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity". Suddenly I received a surge of energy and encouragement. I realized that if God wanted someone older, he would have put the desire in someone elses heart and not in mine. I don't need to be older to do God's will. Despite my age, I trust that God is with me every step of the way. He is in control. It's just my job to shine the light.

Machu Picchu

Woke at 4.30am to begin the big adventure to Machu Picchu which translates and 'old mountain', everyone pronounces Picchu wrong and apparently the wrong pronunciation translates to something very rude!! To be perfectly honest, after a horrible night of sleep, I wasn't too much of a happy chappy to be waking up so early, but I dragged myself out of bed - knowing that it would be worth it, well, hoping that it would be worth it.

After the insanely scary bus ride, upon arrival, it was six o'clock. With the huge river rushing 400m below, the mountains were still towering, hazed over my morning mist. It was chilly, very chilly. Some say Machu Picchu was built for astronomy, others think it was a retreat for the Incas, there are endless theories. Truthfully, no body knows what the site was for, one can only guess. There was and is nothing written in any Incan or Spanish writing that mentioned the site at all, I guess trying to figure out the unknown adds to the mystery of the place. The site is huge, it took more than three hours to explore. Standing at the top, looking down on what I've always wanted to see, was deeply empowering.

At one point I looked through my viewfinder and it felt like I was taking a picture of a picture, but on lowering the camera, the realization that I was actually at Machu Picchu kicked in and I felt a profound wonder settle inside me. It was an amazing experience, an experience that I can try my hardest to explain, but mere words cannot express the vast beauty and sereneness the place conjured.

Being there made me feel an odd sense of nostalgia for something, some people and some time that I will never know.

And getting up at 4.30 was, no doubt, worth it.

Llamas!

Visited some Inca remains today, it was really cool. But to be honest, the newborn llama that was there was way better. It was so cute, with big googley eyes and skinny legs...like an odd looking Bambi.

Yesterday I had the day to myself in Cusco so I roamed the streets, I went to an amazing cathedral, the cathedral of Saint Dominico, it is so beautiful and the artwork inside is amazing. I then did some shopping, there are sweaters/ponchos/hats/socks everywhere, so I don't need to worry if I get cold!! I got an awesome blanket with every colour imaginable on it.

For dinner I went to Yanapay restaurant which gives all of it's proceeds to making a better life for street children. So the entire place was themed with hanging kites, lanterns, there were soft toys and board games, and cartoon menus. Very cute. AND the food was good. In Peru their main course is lunch, so I've started getting used to that, and I mainly have soup at night. Soup is good because it warms me in the freezing cold!!

Tomorrow I'm off to the Sacred Valley ready to climb Machu Picchu at six the next morning!!

cusco cusco CUSCO

Cusco is an amazing city, i love love love it!! (better than Lima any day) All of the bulidings are terricotta, all the streets are cobbled and lined with tiny coffee shops, street markets and everything is so beautiful. Around the city there are about thrity beautiful churches that are breathtaking!

Cusco was originally the ´city of the Gods´and the main city in Peru, when the Spanish invaded they conquered the city and changed the capital to Lima. Now Cusco is a hybrid of traditional Peruvians - the Quecha (the Incas were their kings) and the Spanish. Because of this mix the culture and architecture is so brilliant.

I went to the biggest market in Cusco, the meat section was revoltiong, but they told me it was traditional for menopausal women to drink beef penis soup. yuk!! I´ll suggest that remedy to work when I get back! Of course, the food here is quite interesting, on the menu last night was llama loin and guinea pig! Incidentally I met a llama today and was then offered fried guinea pig, I politely refused. As I´m sure a lot of you would do too!

Till next time
Laura

Pacific coast and Starbucks

Woke up in Lima this morning, due to jet lag, at five. After heading downstairs for breakfast I adventured into the district of miraflores. About a one minute walk and I found myself in a park on a huge cliff with a beautiful lighthouse on it's edge. All along the cliff edge was a cute brick wall and a boardwalk. As I had a lot of time to kill I headed off to see what I could find. The view of the vast and rugged pacific ocean a couple of hundred meters down was amazing in itself. The walk, dotted with park after park, ended me at a really cute shopping centre. Nice bookstores, dunkin donuts, craft shops and starbucks (which is where I am now) created a very good morning for my first in Peru!

The language difference hasn't been too bad. Most of the time I get by. But thanks to my dark hair tourists have mistaken me for a Peruvian and have begun to ask for directions in broken Spanish!! Lucky for them I do speak english...but unlucky for them I don't know the directions.


I wish I had more time to explore Lima, but I'm off to Cuzco tomorrow. According to the whole world Cuzco is THE place, so hopefully I'll forget my sadness in leaving Lima.

Adios for now mi amigos!!

Love love
Laura

Awake for 28 hours

Today's the day!

Today is the day that I'm finally flying to Peru!! I've created this blog to update along the way, sometimes it will be daily but other times posts will be rare. Nonetheless, you can tune in from time to time and see what shennanigans I've been up too! The only request I have is prayers to keep me safe and that God can do his work through me. Lots of love Laura